Major League Mistakes

Posted on October 31, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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With the Cleveland Indians playing in the 2016 World Series, a local theater showed the cult classic, Major League. Do you spot any errors in this sentence from an announcement of the special showings?

Lead by veteran player, Jake Taylor (Tom Berenger) and a new rookie pitcher, Ricky Vaughn (Charlie Sheen), this would-be losing team shows them just what their made of and starts winning just to spite her.

The errors

1. Oops. We have a surprisingly common error in the first word. That should be the past tense led, of course. (Get the lead out?)

2. Here’s a tougher one to catch and properly correct and explain. If we have a comma in front of Jake Taylor, we need to finish the job with a comma after the parenthesis following Berenger. But wait. The “correct correction” is deleting the comma before Jake Taylor because veteran player is just an adjective phrase describing who Jake is. (The two commas setting off Ricky Vaughn, however, are correct because of the word a. If we took out a, we’d treat Ricky the same as Jake: and new rookie pitcher Ricky Vaughn (Charlie Sheen).

3. Ouch. We were expected to know the difference between there, their, and they’re by third grade. Mistakes at that level undermine our credibility.

So we end with this: Led by veteran player Jake Taylor (Tom Berenger) and a new rookie pitcher, Ricky Vaughn (Charlie Sheen), this would-be losing team shows them just what they’re made of and starts winning just to spite her.

That Tribe team emerged victorious. Now I’m hoping for the real one to do the same.

You can learn more about my workshops on writing in the workplace, individual coaching, editing, and handbook – 100+ Instant Writing Tips – at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml. Thank you.

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Sports News

Posted on October 24, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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Even the most casual sports fan knows that tonight the two teams with the longest championship droughts in baseball will be facing off in the opening game of the 2016 World Series. But did you know we are making a teeny mistake if we write “Go Tribe!” or “Go Cubs!”? It should be “Go, Tribe!” or “Go, Cubs!” Let’s review.

How would you punctuate “I congratulate you Zelda on your award”? We need a comma on either side of “Zelda” because we are addressing her directly, right? So we also need punctuation on either side of “Tribe” and “Cubs” because in “Go, Tribe!” and “Go, Cubs!” it’s as though we are talking directly to the team.

Citing this error is nitpicking, however, so I wouldn’t fret about the punctuation unless you’re thinking of getting a “Go, Tribe!” or “Go, Cubs!” tattoo.

In other sports news …

In case you were wondering if the WNBA has ended its season, this item from last week will fill you in. Look for an amusing error in the second sentence of the report.

Nneka Ogwumike’s short jumper with 3.1 seconds left gave the Los Angeles Sparks a 77-76 victory over the defending champion Minnesota Lynx for their first title in 14 years in the deciding game of the WNBA finals on Thursday night. The league MVP joined her teammates in celebration as a stunned crowd slowly filed out after finishing with 12 points and 12 rebounds.

Wow. I didn’t know attendees of WNBA games get to participate on the court. And apparently members of the crowd at the final game performed well.

The culprit? The infamous dangling modifier. The words “after finishing with 12 points and 12 rebounds” need to appear directly in front of or directly after the player who accomplished that feat. So this would work: After finishing with 12 points and 12 rebounds, the league MVP joined her teammates in celebration as a stunned crowd slowly filed out. 

Go, Tribe!

You can learn more about my workshops on writing in the workplace, individual coaching, editing, and handbook – 100+ Instant Writing Tips – at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml. Thank you.

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Shades of Gray

Posted on October 17, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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Sometimes we tax our gray matter over word choices that seem … well, gray. (Or is it “grey”?) Let’s look at a few.

Orient vs. orientate
Neither is wrong, but “orientate” is more British. Here in the U.S. we can stick with “orient.”

U.S. vs. US
This one is a headache because not all style guides agree, and some say the decision depends on whether we are using the abbreviation as a noun or adjective. (And the AP Stylebook recommends “U.S.” but “US” in headlines.) I’d hazard a recommendation to just lean toward “U.S.” and save our brain power for more important distinctions.

Toward vs. towards
They mean the same thing, so we’re all right if we go with “toward” every time. (The Brits prefer “towards.”)

All right vs. alright
“All right” is the correct one, but “alright” has become fairly well accepted in informal writing. Check back in 50 years when texting has given way to something we can’t even imagine now.

PS It’s “gray” – if you live in the U.S.

You can learn more about my workshops on writing in the workplace, individual coaching, editing, and handbook – 100+ Instant Writing Tips – at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml. Thank you.

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Words Matter

Posted on October 10, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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Ironically, although an HR firm’s online article was titled “Words Matter,” it contained this sentence in need of editing. How would you improve it?

As the economy has improved there are less active candidates in the marketplace.

The two errors

We need a comma after the introductory clause, and – because “candidates” is plural – we need to change “less” to “fewer.” The edits yield this corrected sentence: As the economy has improved, there are fewer active candidates in the marketplace.

The enhancement

Fastidious editors aren’t finished yet, however, because using “there are” or “there is” generally weakens our writing. The word “there” is often unnecessary, and with “are” or “is” we have settled for the unexciting verb “to be.” So whenever we have the time, we should reword to eliminate “to be” or use a form of “to be” as a helping verb with a verb that has some pep. For example …
As the economy has improved, we find fewer active candidates in the marketplace.
As the economy has improved, we are finding fewer active candidates in the marketplace.

Your library

For more on “there is,” go to my debut post back in September 2104: http://www.normfriedman.com/blog/dont-stumble-at-the-start/

You can learn more about my workshops on writing in the workplace, individual coaching, editing, and handbook – 100+ Instant Writing Tips – at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml. Thank you.

Posted in Common Grammar Errors, Common Punctuation Errors, Commonly Confused Words, Flair & Finesse | Leave a comment

Bridget Jones’s Baby

Posted on October 3, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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Is the punctuation in the title of the current movie correct? Yep. Would Jones’ also be correct? Yep. Sounds complicated, so let’s approach this in baby steps. We’ll start with a name not ending in “s” or “z,” such as Smith:

Singular, not possessive: I hired Smith.
Singular and possessive: I borrowed Smith’s car.
Plural, not possessive: I bumped into the Smiths.
Plural and possessive: I love the Smiths’ new home.

Now for a name ending in “s” or “z”

Singular, not possessive: I hired Jones.
Singular and possessive: I borrowed Jones’s (OR Jones’) car.
Plural, not possessive: I bumped into the Joneses.
Plural and possessive: I love the Joneses’ new home.

Four postscripts

1. Because you’re right either way in making a name like Les, Bess, or Perez possessive (Les’s OR Les’, Bess’s OR Bess’, Perez’s OR Perez’, determine your style and stick with it.

2. When you don’t like the way something looks, such as Bess’s solution – even though it’s correct and consistent with your style – just reword it. You might make that Bess offered a solution….

3. Note that the most common error in handling names is yielding to the illogical temptation to insert an apostrophe in front of the “s” when making a name plural. So it’s not We invited the Parker’s to our picnic. It’s We invited the Parkers to our picnic. 

4. If you’re a masochist, you can find additional guidelines on apostrophes in names, but adhering to the grid above will keep you sane and safe.

You can learn more about my workshops on writing in the workplace, individual coaching, editing, and handbook – 100+ Instant Writing Tips – at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml. Thank you.

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Handling “Both”

Posted on September 26, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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Last night, one of the network newscasters called the presidential race “nail-bitingly close for both candidates.” Hmm. So if the race is close for one of them, doesn’t it stand to reason that the race is about the same for the other?

The moral of the story? Watch out for the word “both.” It is often redundant and even nonsensical, as in a news item I recently spotted about a jail sentence: “Both terms will be served consecutively,” the article reported. No, let’s make that “The terms will be served consecutively.”

So is the word “both” useless? Not at all. It’s great for emphasis. For example, if we usually send just one representative to our company’s national meeting, we might inform the staff that we have decided “to send both Barry and Terri.” Or we could comment that we found a movie “both suspenseful and whimsical.”

This week’s 60-second tip: “Both” is a valuable word, but we’re wise to store it in a drawer marked “Handle with care.”

You can learn more about my workshops on writing in the workplace, individual coaching, editing, and handbook – 100+ Instant Writing Tips – at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml. Thank you.

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“A” for “Alert”

Posted on September 19, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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This week’s 60-second tip covers two occasions when the word “a” should signal an alert:

1. Watch out for abbreviations after the word “a.” I just read an article, for example, that referred to a NFL record. Yes “N” is a consonant, but we pronounce it “en,” so the pronunciation of the letter begins with a vowel sound. We, of course, should write a National Football League record but an NFL record.

2. Remember that a criteria is never correct because “criteria” is plural. When we have just one standard, we want the singular: criterion. So another NFL-related item I spotted this week was in error when it noted (regarding a former football star’s nomination to the NFL Hall of Fame, despite his currently serving a long prison sentence) that character is not a criteria.

And maybe correctness is not a criterion of solid sports reporting. Just kidding.

You can learn more about my workshops on writing in the workplace, individual coaching, editing, and handbook – 100+ Instant Writing Tips – at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml. Thank you.

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60-Second Tip

Posted on September 12, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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Last week, in the newly shortened format for year 3 of my blog, we simply struck the needless “who is” in the first sentence of a movie synopsis. Now what would you do to refine the article’s second sentence (which has more problems)?

Tyler is a young man who is desperately seeking direction from a world that seems to have abandoned him. Everyday at school he fights for survival, as he is easy prey amongst the endless hallways of fellow student predators.

Edits

1. We want “Every day” (two words), an adverb phrase that answers the question “When?” “Everyday” is an adjective that commonly comes right before the thing it is modifying and answers the question “What kind of?” (I decided to wear my everyday jacket.)

2. “Amongst” isn’t wrong, but it can sound distractingly old-fashioned in American English, where the usual choice is “among.”

3. “Fellow student predators” makes it seem that Tyler is a predator too. Moreover, we don’t need both “prey” and “predators.” Ironing out all of that is difficult, so your solution may have been quite different from mine:

Tyler is a young man desperately seeking direction from a world that seems to have abandoned him. Every day at school, among the endless hallways of student predators, he fights for survival.

You can learn more about my workshops on writing in the workplace, individual coaching, editing, and handbook – 100+ Instant Writing Tips – at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml. Thank you.

 

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60-Second Tip

Posted on September 6, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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New & improved?

As the blog enters year 3, I am markedly shortening my weekly writing tips, but you can always browse http://www.normfriedman.com/blog/ in search of meatier entries. Each of my first 102 posts is about a three- or four-minute read.

Today’s challenge

See if you can make one quick refinement to the opening sentence of a movie synopsis. (We’ll look at the second, more problematic, sentence next week.)

Tyler is a young man who is desperately seeking direction from a world that seems to have abandoned him.

I don’t see any errors, but we do have a weakness here. Because the verb “to be,” in all its forms, has no sizzle, let’s fix Tyler is a young man who is …. Do you see the remedy? We can just delete who is and voila! Tyler is a young man desperately seeking direction from a world that seems to have abandoned him.

Today’s tip: Watch out for constructions like “who is,” “that were,” and “which have been.” They often can be eliminated.

You can learn more about my workshops on writing in the workplace, individual coaching, editing, and handbook – 100+ Instant Writing Tips – at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml. Thank you.

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Summer Reading V

Posted on August 29, 2016 by Norm Friedman

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Do you have a perfect score for August? If so, the pressure’s on to close out the month with one more A+. Make your choices.

1. In lieu of/In light of the growing friction between Andrew and Becky, we are assigning him to a different team.
2. Supposably/Supposedly, Carol once performed in an off-Broadway musical, but I am skeptical.
3. I heard the Old Mill Road construction won’t be completed for a while/awhile.
4. Because this year’s convention is within driving distance, we are sending an unusually large contingency/contingent.

The answers

1. In lieu of means “instead of” or “in place of.” Here we want in light of.

2. Supposable (meaning “able to be supposed or imagined”) and supposably are in the dictionary, but most of us will never need either word. We do often want another word for “purportedly,” however, and that would be supposedly – which frequently carries a touch of irony in that something is supposed to be true, but we aren’t buying it.

3. Yes, awhile is a word, but in the above example we want two words: a while. Here’s the difference (grammar alert!): Awhile is an adverb, so it modifies a verb. (“Seeing as the drinks are free, let’s stay awhile.”) But following a preposition like “for” or “after,” we need an object of that preposition, so we want a while. (“We’ve decided to stay for a while.”)

A while is also the choice when we need a direct object. (“Please give me a while to make my decision.”)

4. The word for a delegation or representative group is a contingent, not a contingency. We want contingency when we are expressing uncertainty or referring to something unknown. (“I thought I was prepared, but I hadn’t allowed for that contingency.”)

Note that contingent can also be used to express uncertainty. (“My attendance at the event is contingent on my being in town.”)

In addition to presenting workshops on writing in the workplace, Norm Friedman is a writer, editor, and writing coach. His 100+ Instant Writing Tips is a brief “non-textbook” to help individuals overcome common writing errors and write with more finesse and impact. Learn more at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml.

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